RUNNING~

if we choose to run from problems, trust me. it would not solve. try solving. overcoming or just trying.

maybe now you think its okey. but actually, you maybe are. how about others?

its best to talk then to hide.

stop running. if you did it the last time. and the outcomes was bad. dont do it this time. the outcome will be horrible. more horrible.

its your choice. to run or to stay.

Grey Sky Morning

why do we see grey sky?

maybe if we could fix and adapt to things, its easier. maybe that way its more easier? i dont think forcing is the way that could help to heal the grey sky in between.

maybe i'll open up one day. it takes time. time. just. time.

if we keep on pushing things, one side will eventually hurt. and if we didnt the other side will also tend to be hurt.why does things appear to be difficult? these kind of things make me love the busy life. everyday full of things to do. have no time to stop and think. have no time to feel the pain. just ahead. ahead and make a new day filled with adventurous things.

sometime we think we'll be fine by our self. its easy to dream by our own. but actually its harder to walk on your own. then we come to realize that theres someone that we can hold on to. we see the bright side from the beginning to the end when theres a shoulder to lean on. but maybe some one have to give time. take a step back and wait. just to stop making things hard. just maybe.

im lucky to have someone by my side. i make my life easier when i believe in them. it just all need some time. As a wise men said himself. trust take years to develop. i believe in a gift of a friend. a family. a lover. a person by my side. it makes me belong somewhere. and i hope that you make yourself feels that way. 

GET REAL??!!

Nobody i mean nooobody trust me that i have become a such an obedient nerd since i entered college. *NOT* haha

let me share with you why is this so. In school, i was such a lazy girl. I'm always active with curriculums and for my academics? too poor. i never finished my homeworks. okay not never but sometimes. and i usually fall asleep during class especially addmat! and thats way im terrible in countings :D ngeeheee and i'm always busy with my prefect meetings and scouting's and other stuff i joined. So when i post pictures of me in the library they find me quiet funny when i'm studying because its just too impossible.

For my family, huh, lagi laa. I waste time a lot so they know that im am as lazy as they see me. When i do my work my siblings would go, GET REAL?, or OUH PUH-LEASE stop pretending to be an angel would ya -- haha yeah so called supporting siblings --"

In my class my classmates see's me as an angel. awww. i'm so touched! thankyou. but i would warn you to not be surprise. i'm hardworking now because i know i need to catch up coz im no smarty pants like azram so i don't wanna dissapoint my parents as im always a dissapointment to them. :B

ALONE

My family went to Kelantan to visit my grandma except my elder brother, the twins and me. They had work on wednesday and for me, i wanted to study. ( konnonnye) haha. My family went back on friday night and came back on wednesday night. 

So its all clear that i stayed home alone on wednesday. On the holiday, unfortunately i caught up watching movies instead. Stupid me ! >< i started studying on monday. I made a list that i have only 7 days until my holidays are up so, each day i planned to stduy one subject per day starting on monday. and im glad to still keep on track. Surprisingly :D

My family came back and boy oh boy they went shopp'en. -_- my sisters ofcourse shop shop till they dropped *including my mum. and my dad bought an Ipad 2. yeah surprising and my sister cahnged phone. Haha about these gadget im not so interested. Naaahh. just gadgets, unless i bought them with my money then i can sure tell how costly those were. hehe

So my mum came home and ask what i dooo during the holss? i was like doing my stuff and movies eat and sleep. Then she's like, ouh really? or you wanted to go out with your friends? haha i did nott. She doesnt trust me, i did not even bring any clothes with me because i knew i would intend to go out soo, thats why i fooled myself. My family thought i went out the past few days. -_-" I soo stayed home and layed with maa books. 

PLEASEE

GIRLS.

i AM SO ASHAMED TO BE CALLED A GIRL SEEING NOWADAYS GIRLS ARE SO WASTED.

We have dignity. take care of them. No guys like a slut. sexy wasted and socially addicted to loitering late nights. Its a sore in the eyes just seeing these types of girls that has lost their moral values. have you no shames? 

Cover yourself. No hijab thats fine. But no pants? no t-shirt? i'm ashamed. Really? we are muslims. If you are Chinese or an Australian than you may have the right to walk around wearing your skin. With the tittle of Islam stamped on your forehead, you are giving shame to others. How could you let your body suffer in the pair eyes of an unworthy men. 

Wake up. You don't need to feel insecure. Cover up a little. walking around in tank tops, shorts and leggings are not attractive. you are fooling yourself. Guys with low shattered moral will waste their time on you. As a girl friend you are qualified. Your hot sexy and wanted. But as a wife, you would be rejected. men with dignity and straight headed moral would want a girl to be valued and be the first to see them, not some secondhand. You're young and wild. you are free to live your life but with some dignity at least.

Girls nowadays looks more towards wealth. theres no wealthy man unless its their iman. Even i don't prefer guys to be rich but such socially annoying. Even though he's not well groomed or is not the wealthy man every girl wants, i prefer it that way as long he has some moral values and respect.

So puh-lease wake up and learn that life is not for granted when you enjoy without thinking that you are a muslim. Have some shame and try to bring good names to those who cherish the beauty of islam.

CATS CATS CATS

I WISH I HAD A CAT. :( muummyy doesnt like cats but daddy loves them and so does my siblings. Ouh mummy. please approvee >.<


THERE SOOOO ADORABLEE! <3

Awwwww..

A date

Today i went on a date :)

with my not- awesome and lame brother :D

-OOTD-

heres my not cool brother- mujaddid :D (hope he does'nt read this, heee)

We went to putrjaya to get my sisters television that she bought and went for a stroll and shopp'en for appliances then went to McD to eat as my brother loves junk food. -_- 

I knew that my juniors from school would be working there so.. yup, went to the counter to order and they're like kak fatnin! haha yeahh. i mean 80% of the workers were my juniors. haha but unfortunately they thought my brother was my boyfiee . eewwww. -- so we ate and ate and stop at shops just strolling around and headed home sweet home :)

Quote of the month

The World is not a Wish Granting- Factory

A moment at Alamanda

Tick tock tick tock. ITS FEBRUARY. i have not shared a lot with you the past couples of weeks. How are you doing mate? hehe

Well here i wanna share my story with chuuu.. i have a lot going on these days. A LOT. but unfortunately i didn't have the time to write. So i'm taking this opportunity.:)

A day out to ALAMANDA with the stepmother (kak rina), the maids ( Ina and comel), the step daughter ( nadhirah) haha why all these names? it was given by the housemates. :D and i am the cinderella. HAHA

not because i'm the prettiest or something. its because ina and comel usually gangs up on me and nadhirah joins in so i have my adorable stepmother to take control haha while i just nodd and smile. *evil mee* haha its like a drama between us that is actually maent to be funny. ^^

so, kak rina was cooking and wanted us all to puhleasse wake up. it was noon (11 oclock) how terrible! hehe but last night we slept at 4.30 am due to the trip we went to batu caves to meet up with ina's brother so it was a long trip home. We woke up and brushed our teeth and wash our face and ate. But then comel had to go to Shah Alam to buy her stationaries at master art gallery with her friends. so it was left four of us. Ina and nadhirh wanted to go to the bank so we all went. and on the way kak rina whispered to me, lets go to Alamanda? and i was like now? we have not showered and with these tracks? haha she's like yeah lets go. So we all agreed and went using the ERL at BTS.

The ticket was rm3. the train was fantastically fine. it was my first time riding the ERL as it was more to classy rather than the other trains. Then we reached the bus station at Putrajaya so we had to wait for the bus number 100-103. these buses are the one that would stop at Alamanda. The bus arrived and off we went for half an hour  enjoying the views and there we were, Alamanda tadaaa. 

We were the most vogued citizens out of all >< we went in and first of all went to eat then walked around and stop at shops. Then i went to the maxis center to pay my bills. We then went in the carefour and looked about. later on Ina and nadhirah went to buy the Vincci shoes as they were 50% on sale. Unfortunately, i was not interested in them soo, kak rina and i strode off and went to the accessories sections. We bought a  cute head band together to make Comel jealous :P hehe 

we went to pray at the nearby surau and on the way looking for it, we were lost so we split up into to, i was with nadhirah and ina was with kak rina. we went to ask for the surau and found it near the foodcourt. Then i tried calling ina and kak rina as we found the surau, unfortunately there were no coverage and their phones were off. -_- so we waited for them in the surau instead. They soon arrived and we performed our prayers. After praying we strolled around and bought snacks. 

It was 6.30 pm already so we rushed back to the bus station as it was really lateeee. When the bus arrived, we chose the seat right at the back and there were these two naughty and very un-matured young boys aging around 16 to 17 years old. They were like "ooooo.. four young girls conquering the back seat"

so ina was like what do you care, such annoying eyesore. so they were like ooo.. the're mad how fierce.. and ina replyed so they quarreled a bit then they ended it by laughing hard and ignoring and playing their musics in such LOUD noise. One whole bus would explode due to their noisiness. -_-"

when we reached the ERL station, we went to perform maghrib and we stopped at the messaging chairs for 3 minutes message. it was totally relaxing. Then we set off back at BTS. Ina and nadhirah wanted to make a pit stop at giant and on the way we stopped and ate there. Then we arrived home at 9 pm. Comel was like why so long! where did you went and did you guys wore the same clothes or you did not showered!! haha :D

Excepting

I'm taking time to speak out my view. and i'm vigorously annoyed.

What do you want actually. you say this and that about someone than they change so that they could be better. Than you say, just be yourself. you dont have to listen to what people say , so they dont but then you criticize them again. Waaahaaaat?

Do you realize how annoying you are when you do that. I think you have a problem. you critic according to your little perception than you compliment and try to work things out. people won't actually like your little attitude when you dont have your self confidence and constant perception. 

I hope you would come to realize that not everything goes your way. What comes around goes around.

Have self respect!

Timeless

The time is jealous of me. How time flies by so quickly.  ><

Its been too long since i've started to write. but i will find time and i hope it allows me to blog. For now i can't update my current activity as i have a lot to study and revise. i'm far behind so rather to waste time i hope to catch up as lecturers nowadays are really bugging me -_- haha well, students life are at the end of the cliff gripping it with the amount energy left you me whom know, may not help you to survive.

so i'll see you around. i have a lot to story here.! ^_^ anyeong!

Identity

Being called someone else and known by mistaken others is not cool man. HAHA

well, you want to have your own identity. who wants to be others? sure you wanna be Heliza Helmi or Miley Cyrus. but don't you like want your own personality. your style, attitude and perspective on yourself? its weird somehow people get jealous for you to have other identities when you yourself doesnt like it. 

i want to be me. FATNIN. don't you want to be YOU??

most things are funny to me when people call me. Fatlin, Fatin, Faznin, Fatnim, Fatini. people never get my name right the first time. i always ALWAYS ALWAYS have to correct their pernounciation. at least three times. so people go, what shall i call you. and i'll be like,Fatnin, Fat, or Nin. i have no other names besides that. and they start laughing. -_- its true. huh..

FATNIN comes the word FATONAH = knowledgeable in arabic. So i hope people would at least pronounce it freakingly right. you would be praying me to be smart. i want that baaaadddd. uuuu. O.O hahaha

So nowadays, when people ask my name, i'll go, wait i'm trying to find my fail that has my name spell on them. and if i dont find it i'll go Fatnin. and they're like faznim? faten? and bla blaaa. so i'll just nod and say yeah something like that. And when they meet up with me or talk while my friends are besides me, they call out my name and my friend will be like, what did you call her? her name is Fatnin and they're like giving me this look of SURPRISE! and go why didnt you ever say some thing. and i'll just say you can call me anything.

I just can't stand the tiredness of repeating every single time and people would go your name is weird and unique. Thanks mommy daddy! :D

I've been quite busy that i had no time to update! sorry!!

okey i'm lying. haha i've been LAZY actually and had laziness accompanying me. Terrible terrible! btw, soon on when i have time i would spend time writing. In the mean time i'll catch you guys later :)

New sem begins

Its been ages i haven't update my blog. always busy with stuff and work and stuff. HAHA work? yeah i dont work.ouh, i'm sorry! I forgot to update my sneak peek that i promised. I was too lazy to update and life was busyyy. :/

Recently i've started my second sem in college. :( why the sad face? well, college is like some boring playground where you have to play by yourself. Can you get how i feel by telling you how boring a child have to play by themselves. its too boring this sem.

The A levels, UPM, KTT and UTM has not registered. i dont know where they went. Now, there is only uitm students left. Its good theres not many students. its actually fun. But, how can the LIBRARY be closed at night! usually it opens at night until 11. but then, -__- i know the A levels usually is the loyalties customersss, doesnt mean that the UITM'S doesnt visit the library oftenly. -_- yup, that i am upset!

Every night , okey i'm lying not every, but most night i would accompany Mimi and Comel to the student lounge for free wifi. they have work to do so i have to accompany them because they would not let me stay home alone.since i have to follow, i dont want to waste my time watching tv and doing nothing so i would revise there or do my assingment AND boy its noisy!  its not a good place to study unless you can adapt to it. but yeah, i could get used to the noisiness in there but still, uncomfortable when you the only one is studying. -_-"

well, enough said. i should just embrace this sem since it just started with such a boring vibe.

Ouchhh!

I fell of a bicycle. :(

Haha. Yesterday i was riding with my brother. at 5 pm. yes it was raining. I mean pouring, not that heavy but i was soaking wet indeed! haha well you know mua. :D

Yess at that time i was freaking bored and i wanted to go out and play. So what the heck just riding my bike. and FYI, i was wearing my pajamas pants. just the pants only. I really love that pants. It was like my favorite PJ's ever. Have you ever felt comfortable wearing a piece of clothes that you FREAKINGLY love? yeah that's what my relationship and the pants had. haha then while i was riding happily.. Somehow and somewhat my pants got stuck between those chains. WHAT! yeah. i don't know how but it just did and i was like whaaaaaaaaat! it was freakingly in  the middle of the road! and i cant even move my foot so i had no choice but to fall sideways. i couldn't get up nor the bike couldn't also be moved because my foot and the bike were like those twins with their body attached together.

Yeah i had to lay their and shout to my brother to help me before a car would came. I was like help me for god sake. my foot! so my brother told me to get up but i cant obviously! so i had to rip my pants a little and finally i could stand and then my brother helped me to untie the tangled pants in that STUP*D chains. 

Here's the funny part. A car came and we moved to the side and gave it some space to run along and not watch but it was like freezing not even moving so i was like hurry and go awayyyy car! huh! -_- After my foot got its freedom the car came closer and said " Did your foot got stuck again? be careful this is your second time. play safely" and i was like wahaaat??? so i just nodded simply and rode back home. 

MUMMY! i came home and told me mum.. She said that i should not ride in the rain and to be careful and wear some proper attire the next ti,e. What a mum! I LOVE YOU :)

Then my sister overheard and told me she got stuck too once. So that aunty must have seen her fell and thought it was me. HAHA boy oh boy. :)

Once you fall doesn't mean you can't get up and try again. Go for it and learn your mistakes! :)

SONG FOR THE DAYY

Taylor Swift - Forever and Always

LYRICS :

Once upon a time, I believe it was a Tuesday when I caught your eye
And we caught onto something
I hold onto the night, you looked me in the eye and told me you loved me
Were you just kidding?
'cause it seems to me, this thing is breaking down
We almost never speak
I don't feel welcome anymore
Baby what happened, please tell me?
'cause one second it was perfect, now you're halfway out the door
And I stare at the phone, he still hasn't called
And then you feel so low you cant feel nothing at all
And you flashback to when he said forever and always
Oh, and it rains in your bedroom
Everything is wrong
It rains when you're here and it rains when you're gone
Cause I was there when you said forever and always
Was I out of line?
Did I say something way too honest, made you run and hide
Like a scared little boy
I looked into your eyes
Thought I knew you for a minute, now I'm not so sure
So here's everything coming down to nothing
Here's to silence that cuts me to the core
Where is this going? Thought I knew for a minute, but I don't anymore
And I stare at the phone, he still hasn't called
And then you feel so low you cant feel nothing at all
And you flashback to when he said forever and always
Oh, and it rains in your bedroom
Everything is wrong
It rains when you're here and it rains when you're gone
'cause I was there when you said forever and always
You didn't mean it baby, I don't think so

Back up, baby, back up
Did you forget everything
Back up, baby, back up
Did you forget everything
'cause it rains in your bedroom
Everything is wrong
It rains when you're here and it rains when you're gone
'cause I was there when you said forever and always
Oh, I stare at the phone, he still hasn't called
And then you feel so low you cant feel nothing at all
And you flashback to when we said forever and always
And it rains in your bedroom
Everything is wrong
It rains when you're here and it rains when you're gone
'cause I was there when you said forever and always
You didn't mean it baby, you said forever and always.

The tone is catching and the music is harmony'ing and the lyrics are touching! :D

PHOTOSHOOT GEDIK TIME. :D

Movie nite

Its been too long since we watched a movie. This was at Alamanda at 12 midnight. haha Went out with my siblings. Watched SKYFALL. i was sleeping that time and my brother woke me up and said hurry i'll wait in the car and went off like that. I WAS LIKE. wahaaaatttt?? my sister ran in and said come on. we're watching Skyfall. and i was in my pajamas. -_- and my brother is in the car. and i just woke up. OMAIGOD. My siblings. -_- so i washed my face and got change. Selendang was an easy options. you just throw on your head and wrap it around. TADAAAA..haha i wonder if my brothers knows i'm a girl. i wished they would just treat me like a girl. i mean, i'm not a boy that could just get ready by changing. Ergh -_-" hahaha

oh, we came home at 3 am. It was funnnnnn! :) i love my siblings even if they are a wild crazy one! ^^ well, theres time you would be crazy.

OMAIGUCCI!

I was wrong. it was on the 9th November! my result was on 9th NOVEMBER! -_-

Haha did i bold that clearly? well. I seriously never thought my results was here this early. It was like this. i slept really late around 3am watching movies with my 19th year old sista, Umairah. We watched THE SWITCH. I recommend this movie! :D btw, get back on track on my story here.. It was at 11am before my mummy had to go to work. She woke my sister up to check her results. And guest what, she got DEKAN again. she's in sem 3 btw. yeah. dekan non stop. :'( LUCKY her. My mum was really happy and woke me up quickly. she's like, Fatnin get up, Umairah got 3.5.! hurry check yours. And i instantly woke up and my heart was pounding really hard. I felt that maybe i would die kind of feeling. you get me right. ><

I went downstairs. sat in front of the computer while my mum and my sisters watched around me. I didn't even wash my face. DISGUSTING? well, it all happened so fast. -_-"" i logged in and i was like. SERIOUSLY! i got this much??! and i shut it off. my mum was like, well its okey. i mean 3 pointer and above. You did great. I went upstairs straight away. I cried continuously. non-stop. i kept crying and kept thinking i studied really hard whats wrong with me. I got one C+. it was math. I mean. i could got a B. but because i didn't check my time i had to miss out on a couple of  questions. I mean I JUST DID NOT HAVE ENOUGH TIME! thats all.! i could do it. i really could. but i wasn't alert. The time was so fast. :( 

I cried almost the entire day. :(

Then i took my phone and texted all my lecturers saying that i was sorry to disappoint them and thank you for their blessing and for teaching me through the whole semester. I also texted Miss Halimahtun for not being one of her DEKAN students. I'm sorry. :( 

Then, i called my classmates. Azram got Deakan. OFCOURSE. and the rest had to repeat one subject. for Amira i did not know what she got. She refused to check her result. i'm not sure if she is repeting. I understand her worried-ness. because Share had to repeat math. :3

well, whatever it is. ALHAMDULILLAH. maybe i was trying very hard and Allah did not gave me the chance to get dekan this sem because the next sem i might not work as hard as i work now. So yeah, next sem i WILL increase my RESULT! i will score math! no matter how. And i PROMISE. 

I study because of Allah. Because of Him, i want my parents to be happy. I'm sorry. :3

15th November!

Scary! Its when the results are out. I am scared. i wonder what would i get. even how it turned out its all in Allah's will. i have to accept it and move on or just give hard times on myself. whatever i get Tawakal is all i have to do. Pray for me! :'} and BEST OF LUCK to you!! :)